Will I ever feel "normal" again?
Normal... what is normal? Was I normal before breast cancer? I can still get out of bed, luckily I can still work my job, I can still play with my kids, I can still work out BUT it's different now. What do I mean by that?
Let me explain - getting out of bed takes me a little longer. My husband usually deals with the kids in the morning so I can lay in bed a bit longer. My body aches so I stretch a bit in bed. When I stand up my feet hurt and I hobble to the bathroom. It can take me a few minutes before the ache goes away. Was I like this before cancer? Not really. Yes I do like my sleep so me staying in bed longer that may be the same - wink, wink. But everything else - I believe is cancer related - hey I'm still somewhat young so the aches shouldn't be there... yet.
Job - still the same, that hasn't changed, play with kids - now I am getting up there as I'm 42 so my energy is lower. Sitting on the ground is hard as it's hard for me to get up off the ground. I've been working on the aches through physical therapy.
Working out - now that has changed for me. Everyone is different. I see women who also dealt with cancer running marathons and hiking and doing all sorts of things and I'm envious. I am currently doing youtube videos and after 15 minutes I'm done. I'm tired. I'm working on it though because it helps with my stress.
So my new normal is different and that's ok! I'm learning to embrace it.